


Quinceanera

by nameofthisuser



Series: Invaders Investigators AU [1]
Category: Invader Zim
Genre: BAMF Gaz (Invader Zim), Dib and Gaz are Siblings (Invader Zim), M/M, Prequel, dib and zim arnt together yet but god are they so accidentally gay for each other, gaz pov, there's literal tourture in this so please be weary my dudes
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-11
Updated: 2020-06-11
Packaged: 2021-03-03 23:07:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 9,518
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24663562
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nameofthisuser/pseuds/nameofthisuser
Summary: planning a quince alone is hard enough, and now Gaz has to deal with a moody brother now, too? jeezz...
Relationships: Dib/Zim (Invader Zim)
Series: Invaders Investigators AU [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1783222
Comments: 1
Kudos: 63





	Quinceanera

**Author's Note:**

> one more warning, a man is literally tortured to death, and that includes but is not limited to skinning alive and waterboarding. also heavy themes of the after effects of grooming and rape.
> 
> link to the ask blog:https://invadersinvestigators.tumblr.com/

**T-minus 7 days.**

"I need one thing from you, Dad, and one thing alone," Gaz said with a calm but strict voice.

Professor Membrane lowered his mug of tea to ask, "And what is that, Gazlene?"

"Be there for the father/daughter dance. I can handle all of the planning on my own." She said with an equally stern voice, "It'll be the first dance of the night so when something comes up you can go, but  _ be there. For the father/daughter dance. _ "

Membrane took a sip of tea and resumed reading from his tablet, stating, "I wouldn't miss it for the world."

Gaz nods, "Good." She popped some super bread into the super toaster.

"I'm off to work." Professor Membrane said. Turning around, Dib was standing in the doorway, his Swollen Eyeball suitcase held in his arms, overstuffed with, what appeared to be handwritten notes, sticking out of the forced shut mouth. Dib frowned at his father, "Bye."

"See you later, kids." Membrane said. Gaz dismissed, "Uh-huh."

Dib slid between Gaz and the toaster, snatched a slice of toast and bit it dry.

"You will pay for that," Gaz said, brandishing a steak knife and pointing it at him.

"Okay, but wait until tonight." Dib disregarded, pinching the blade and twisting away from his throat, "I'm meeting up with one of the Swollen Eyeball agents who said he's got undeniable proof of aliens and wants my take on it."

He held the suitcase up to his face, grinning widely and drummed the logo with his fingers, "Since  _ I'm  _ the extraterrestrial expert!"

"You're the extraterrestrial-philiac all right, and Dib, that sounds sketchy as fuck." Gaz waved the knife in a circle to emphasize her point.

"There's nothing sketchy about it! I've been talking to him about Zim for years!" Dib tells her, nearly bouncing across the room to grab an entire bottle of honey to chug, "He even once helped me get a spaceship to stop Zim!"

Gaz frowns, "Is this the one that made a ship and suited that was only big enough for you to fit in?"

"Yep! He wanted to help me catch Zim because he's my friend." Dib pointed at Gaz, where Gaz's head was going, again.

"Sounds like a pe-"

"For the last time, HE'S NOT A PEDOPHILE!" Dib threw his hands in the air, "Whatever. Don't wait up for me."

"Wouldn't dream of it!" Gaz singsang after Dib before he slammed the door. Gaz rolled her eyes, muttering to herself, "How am I related to that?"

She tossed the knife back into the drawer and it landed haphazardly against the other assorted large knives..

She chomped on the toast Dib didn't steal as she grabbed a pair of rubber gloves and a medical mask from under the kitchen sink. In the backyard, right beside the door, sat a sealed bucket with a mallet and a crowbar lying beside it. She picked up the crowbar and pried the lid off before kicking it over, a frothy mess of fleshy, bloody liquid spilled out into the grass, leaving behind the solid, filthy suds and the cleared bones of a raccoon. Finding no remaining meat, she plucked the bones from the corpse stew left in the grass and brung them inside, filling the kitchen with the stink of rot, and rinsing off the remains in the sink. She hummed a much too happy tune as the lye-laced water ran down the drain.

Between planning a giant birthday party completely by herself on top of the usual antics of her family, this was the only thing keeping the last strings of her sanity knotted together in a loose tangle. She didn't have much time for video games between bookings and orderings but wiping down the carcass that Zim's strange little robot had brought to Dib as a gift when the bot was ordered to spy on him with peroxide to bleach it could be done absentmindedly as she made her phone calls. 

***

The door slammed shut, rustling the picture frames. With every department closed for the night, Gaz had decided to squeeze in a few rounds of shooters and to get a confirmation that her gaming buddies were indeed coming, as she waited on her dinner to be delivered. Dib had come home, noticeably pissed and sporting a few tears in the collar of his shirt. Strangely, his jacket was folded over his arms in front of himself. Even in the middle of summer or when it's torn to shreds by Zim, he still dawned the jacket when he left the house like it was as necessary as pants. Gaz didn't give a second thought as she teased, "Planet saved for another day?"

"Fuck off," he hissed, hiking his jeans up. 

Gaz opens her mouth, ready to snap back just like every other time he'd gotten snippy at her, but a sudden wave of something deeply wrong floods Gaz's stomach. She watches him. He  _ looked  _ like he had run into Zim, and lost for the day, but even when he lost their fist fights, Dib still ranted and raved about getting even.

She sat down her gaming controller and called after him, "I ordered Pizza."

She hears him stop walking somewhere in the house, and there was a beat before he mumble-shouted, "Not hungry."

She hears the shower start. Gaz hesitantly picked up her controller and returned to her game. After finishing eating, an hour later, Dib was still in the shower. He had left a trail of his clothing.

Jacket, collar was torn off, one sleeve held on by threads.

Shirt ripped at collar and hem. Bloodstained.

Pants, button and zipper missing. Zipper chain missing teeth. Also a rip at the bottom of the teeth, a few inches long.

His boxer shorts specks of blood on the inside.

Gaz feels her own blood run cold.

_ Breath _ , she tells herself. She's overreacting. Dib's gotten into plenty of fights, he's bound to have blood everywhere.

...Right?

  
  


**T-minus 6 days.**

"No, I don't want a stinkin' rose corsage. Make them out of bat orchids and black magic viola's- yes, I'll pay extra." Gaz ordered into the phone. She walked around the house. She was thankful that Dib, for once, was quiet. Stepping into the living room he was sitting on the couch, staring blankly at the television. He had clearly turned it on without watching it because it was some show about middle-aged couples buying houses.

Strange...

Usually, by this time in the day, he either had his nose against some paranormal literature or Zim's fist. But he was still in his pyjamas and a hoodie.

"Miss?" The florist called over the phones, bringing Gaz back to reality. That sour gut feeling returned to her, but Gaz, again, dismissed it. Turning on her heels, returning to the kitchen, continuing her call as she rummaged through the cupboards for a snack.

"I'm still here." She responded, "Could you repeat that?"

Gaz can't help but notice Dib didn't chug back an entire bottle for honey for breakfast like the weirdo he is for once. She mused,  _ guess he's finally growing out of that phase. About time. _

**T-Minus 5 days.**

Dib stared at the television again, but at least he was watching some documentary on a haunted tunnel.

"What do you mean the alterations won't be done?! I brought the dress in  _ early  _ so I won't have to worry -Dib, can you watch that in your room?" She growled.

He stared forward, not even hearing her.

"Dib, go away." She repeated, "Dib. Dib."

The front door swung open, slamming against the wall, and Zim let himself in.

"Dib-Stink! Your absence signifies that you have finally, smartly decided to smartly, surrender, but do not think that I will torture you any less because you got smart!" He shrieked. God, he sounded like someone grating a chipmunk.

Dib had ever so slightly lifted his head to look through Zim. Not satisfied with the barely-an-acknowledgement, Zim climbed the couch armrest to stand on, a couple of inches from his face, jabbed a finger between Dib's collarbone, and bellowed, "I WILL STILL USE YOU AS MY PERSONAL THRONE CHAIR WHEN I RULE THIS PATHETIC PLANET."

Gaz was about to speak for Dib and tell Zim that now wasn't the time, but Dib seemed to wake up from his catatonic state to uppercut Zim, knocking him onto his butt, stood over him, yelled back, "GOOD LUCK SITTING ON ME WHEN I HAVE YOU STRAPPED DOWN-"

"oh mY GOD, I'M ON THE FUCKING PHONECALL! TAKE IT TO YOUR GODDAMN BEDROOM!" Gaz shrieked. Dib turned to say something, his mouth open and a finger in the air like whatever it was was going to start with  _ as a matter of a fact…!  _ But Zim karate chopped Dib behind the knee, which caused him to collapse on Zim like a tree, and forced a wheeze out of the alien.

Gaz cursed under her breath, stood to leave, walking on Dib and crushing them both. Outside, she apologized to the dress tailor, "I am SO sorry about that. My dumbass brother and his boyfriend are fucking crazy. Back to the dress, I don't care if you have to work late, it was supposed to be ready days ago!"

  
  


**T-Minus 4 days.**

"Drive me to the jewellers," Gaz ordered, walking into Dib's bedroom without knocking. He jumped up to shut off his computer screen, shoot her a dirty look, and tell her, "You need to learn to knock.

Gaz sighed, "What? Like I don't already know the freaky shit you're into with how you talk to Zim?"

Dib's face practically blinked into a burgundy red, "What the  _ hell _ are you talking about?!"

"Drive me to the jewellers, " Gaz repeated, "My tiara is ready for pick up. You don't even have to change or come inside. In fact, I'd prefer you didn't. Come inside, I mean. Your clothes reek."

Dib huffed, checked to make sure his screen was still black, before surrendering, "Fine, but I'm choosing the music."

Gaz rolled her head before agreeing, "Deal."

After the fourth Lemon Demon song in a row, Gaz decided that anything would be better than finding out who truly was the ultimate showdown winner, again. It was Mr.Rogers and his bloodstained sweater. It was always Mr.Rogers.

She said, "I hope you didn't destroy anything of mine when Zim kicked your ass yesterday." Dib scoffed, " _No,_ and I kicked _his_ ass!"

"Did you?"

Dib smuggly answered, "Yes!"

"This time?"

Dib didn't answer, just pouted a while, before piping up, "I really just...needed to kick the crap outta something, y'know?"

Gaz nodded, "That's what  _ you're  _ for, and being a chauffeur."

Dib had fallen silent with no rebuttal, before speaking, "Hey, Gaz?" She grunted in acknowledgment.

Another pause, before he shook his head and said, "Nevermind."

"What?"

"No, forget it."

"Dib, you being all vague and passive is only going to make me snoop, so spill it."

Dib signed, clenching the steering wheel until his knuckles turned white, before asking, "Did Dad burn the blueprints to the memory wipe gun when he dismantled it?"

Gaz turned to study his face. He was overly focused on the red light ahead of him. He had deep bags under his unusually dull eyes. If Gaz didn't know better, she could have mistaken them for bruised. His hands trembled and his cheeks were becoming shallow, which provoked Gaz to ask, "When's the last time you ate?"

"I'm not hungry."

"That doesn't answer my question."

Dib countered, "You didn't answer my question first."

Gaz snaped, "Dib."

Dib's shoulders raised to his ears and he squeezed the wheel again. His jaw is clenched shut.

He turned the music back up.

Gaz gazed at him. Despite the summer heat, he was wearing a hoodie and long pyjamas. Her trying to stare the answer out of him failed as he declared, "We're here. Go get your crown. I don't have all day."

**T-Minus 3 days.**

Gaz opened Dib's room without knocking, her shoulder holding her phone to her ear and a bag of Chinese food in her hand. Dib was sitting at his computer desk, head down with his hands tangled in his hair and the membrane logo bouncing around as the screensaver. He slowly raised his head, not saying anything. She plopped the food down in front of it and pointed sternly at it. Dib looked at it like he had no idea what it was.

"Thank you, that's perfect." Gaz said into the phone, "You're the only one doing their job and I love you! Bye!"

"Fake ass bitch." Gaz said, looking at the phone, before turning to Dib and saying, "Eat."

"I'm not-"

"I don't care!" Gaz snapped, "You're skinner than the dead fucking fox I found in the woods last week! It had worms, Dib! And you look worse! Fucking eat!"

Dib eyed the food, and Gaz gave him a fork, knowing he never "had time" for chopsticks Uncultured swine.

He dug at some rice. Gaz leaned against his doorframe.

"What, " He asked, "Are you going to watch me eat?"

"Yup."

"And  _ I'm  _ the freak?"

"Yup."

Dib groaned, dramatically shovelled a fork full into his mouth, and spread his arms out as he chewed, silently asking  _ happy? _

"Great!" Gaz grits her teeth in what may or may not have been a smile, "I'm not leaving until it's all gone."

Dib stated, "Gaz, that's not necessary."

Gaz shook her head, "Prove it to me."

Dib rolled his eyes and shouted, "Fine!"

Dib scowled at her the entire time, blinking at little as possible. Somehow, Gaz appeared to not blink at all.

He flipped the box upside down, showing only a couple of grains of rice falling onto the carpet, "Happy?"

Gaz grinned triumphantly and left. Dib threw the container after her but missed. He laid his head on the desk.

**T-minus 2 days.**

For the first time in days, Professor Membrane was home.

"Is your suit ready?" Gaz blocked him from leaving for work.

He nodded, "I'm picking it up from the dry cleaners before work." Gaz stepped out of the way, letting him leave.

Dib was asleep on the couch. Sometime last night he had passed out watching TV. Any other day, she would have shoved him onto the floor and sat down, but today? She couldn't bring herself to do it. She was pretty sure he hadn't slept all week and the horrible feeling in her gut has not left.

Gaz sighed and threw a blanket over him.

**T-Minus 1 day.**

Dib had slept the entire day, and night, and was still knocked out when Gaz woke up early in the morning. She would have thought he died if it weren't him occasionally stirring.

Gaz made up almost an entire carton of scrambled eggs. She should probably get a cookbook.

"That's…" Dib stood in the doorway and rubbed his eyes, "That is so many goddamn eggs. Why do you need so many eggs?"

"They're not for me." Gaz informed him, handing him a salad bowl full of them, "They're for you."

Dib appeared confused, so Gaz added, "You're not looking like a skeleton during my quince. You need to look as decent as you can, maybe even a 4/10 if you can manage, but right now only necrophiliacs would be willing to look at you."

"One could hope. They find a pulse and nobody would want to touch me again." Dib remarked.

Gaz opened her mouth to sass,  _ finally realize nobody wants to fuck a ball of pimples and hormones?  _ But what comes out is a concerned, "Dib, what do you mean?"

He averted his eyes and shrugged, before taking the egg bowl. He sat at the table and poked the food with a fork, watching the protein be pierced with the prongs.

Gaz felt like she may throw up. She breathed in, before planting herself across from him.

"What's been up with you?" She asked.

"Nothing," Dib lied, "I'm fine."

"You're not eating until forced, you're not sleeping until you just pass out." Gaz pointed out, "You're not leaving the house unless you have too, you haven't changed in days, and I'm pretty sure you've been showering  _ in  _ what you're wearing."

Dib still wouldn't look at her, answering with a fake laugh, "I've always had bad hygiene. You know that."

"Usually, I'd agree. You do go without showers until I dump cold water on you while you sleep." Gaz said, "But you've been showering multiple times a day."

Dib raised his shoulders to his ears, still not meeting her gaze.

"Well, I'm a teenaged boy, Gaz." He half-joked.

Gaz shook her head. She sat in the uncomfortable silence, before she implored, "Why was there blood in your underwear?"

Dib stopped moving.

"Like, a week ago, you left your clothes in the hall when you came home. There was blood in your underwear. Why?"

He mumbled, "I don't want to talk about this, Gaz."

"What happened?" Gaz pressed.

Dib shot up and threw the table to the side, breaking off a leg and throwing the eggs everywhere. He thrust a finger at her, shrieking, "I DON'T WANT TO TALK ABOUT THIS! IT DOESN'T CONCERN YOU!"

"YOU'RE MY STUPID BROTHER AND YOUR ACTING LIKE YOU'RE ALREADY DEAD!" Gaz countered, roughly grabbing his wrist, "OF COURSE IT FUCKING DOES!"

Dib yanked his wrist, bellowing, "What? Suddenly you want to play the nice, caring sister? Fuck off!"

"We don't have to be close for me to see something's clearly fucking wrong!"

"WHEN'S ANYTHING RIGHT?! WE'RE BOTH ILLEGAL EXPERIMENTS WHO DON'T BELONG ANYWHERE!"

"So what!? It's not ideal, but neither is teenage pregnancy and that didn't stop Francine!"

Dib readied another argument but stopped to wear a face of realization before switching it to panic.

"Fuck off!" He repeated, turning to kick the chair over before leaving. Dib slammed his door when he got to his room.

Gaz stood, huffing and clenching her fists, before picking up a still-standing table and, since they needed a new set now anyway, broke it over what remains of the tables. She shouted so Dib could hear, "I WAS ONLY TRYING TO HELP, ASSHOLE!"

Dib appeared in the doorway, sloppily dressed (but at least not the nasty pyjamas), to tell her, "I never asked for your help!"

Gaz stomps after him, demanding, "where are you going?!" 

"Shopping! Not that it's any of your  _ fucking  _ business!" He responded. In his car, he gave Gaz a double bird, which Gaz returned with a sneer.

"Asshole." She repeated to herself as he drove off.

**Blast off.**

"You look beautiful, Gazlene." Membrane said, "Like a gothic Princess Peach."

"Not at all, but I appreciate the attempt." Gaz smiled, before she turned serious, "Remember, you need to be here for the father/daughter dance. That's in a half-hour."

"They can handle things down at the lab without me for a day, " He decided, "I wouldn't miss today for the world!"

"Great! Make sure everyone is here." Gaz instructed. Professor Membrane pulled down his formal turtleneck to kiss her on the forehead.

Not long after he left, Dib replaced him. He walked up behind her as Gaz touched up her makeup. She had been insistent on doing it herself, saying no one could do it better than herself. While he knew it was statistically improbable, Dib wasn't going to argue, she  _ was  _ really good at it.

"You look like a late 1800's aristocrat who marries rich men for their money then kills them by feeding them rat poison so you can use the money to spoil your mistress."

" _ Thank  _ you!" Gaz remarked, "Dad said I looked like Princess Peach."

Gaz turned to him and sighed when she saw Dib's face. He clearly  _ tried  _ to look nice, and after his coma, he didn't look like he has two black eyes anymore, but they were still some leftover bags. Not to mention his cheeks were obviously still sunken.

Gaz ordered him, "Stay still." Before taking out her foundation and dabbing it under his eyes. He jumped in his skin and leaned away, so Gaz Grabbed and dug her nails into his scalp as she blended it in.

"You're lucky I'm a pale ass mofo, too." She remarked, and Dib blew air through his nose.

"There." She said, "Now you only look anorexic."

Dib frowned, "Thanks."

"Your hair looks stupid," Gaz remarked.

Dib repeated, "Thanks."

Gaz grabbed a hair tie, telling Dib, "Come here." He silently obeyed and let her put his hair in a low bun. Gaz patted him on the shoulder, "There, now you look like a fancy hipster douche."

"Thanks."

Gaz anticipated an insult back, but Dib seemed to be in a standing coma again.

Her voice is soft and filled with concern, "Dib, please tell me what's going on with you…"

"I'm fine!" Dib deflected, "Just… a little stressed is all! You don't need to worry."

Gaz, let him sit in the silence, forcing Dib to fill with the emptiness with his ramblings.

"I'm fine, really. Nothing happened. I'm just a little stressed. I'm fine."

Gaz stayed quiet.

"You know me! I always bounce back! I'm fine!"

Gaz just looked at him.

"I'm  _ fine,  _ Gaz! I will be fine! Nothing happened!"

Gaz would have kept forcing him to fill the silence if her phone hadn't gone off.

She told him, "Dad's ready to introduce me. C'mon."

They don't even get a chance to turn before the door burst open, Zim in his disguise shouted, "Aha!"

Dib brought his fist back, preparing to punch him, but Gaz caught it and held Dib's arm behind his back. Zim launched at his face, but Gaz caught him by the throat with her other hand. Gaz, let them both go and force them to look at her.

"If either of you two ruin my quince with your petty fights, I'll force u-shaped toilet seats in the public bathrooms into both of your mouths, then stomp on your heads and flush your shattered teeth. Got it?"

Both the boys are rigid like a soldier as they say in unison, "Got it!"

"Good." Gaz said, and pulled a tiny suit from her dress bag, "Change into this. You're sitting beside Dib."

"WHAT-" Dib started but was cut off by Gaz pretending to flush a toilet and whispering  _ flssssshhhhhhhhh.  _ He snapped his mouth shut.

Gaz went to wave them both out, before requesting, "Dib, can you retighten my corset? Dad did it in a way that has barely any tits out."

"Ew, no. I don't blame him."

"Are you slut-shaming me?

"Is there a problem with not wanting to see my sister's tits?"

Gaz huffed and turned around, "Relax, it's just cleavage."

Dib relented, "Fine. But I swear to god if I see anything, I'll kill myself."

"It'll be easier to flush your teeth, then!" Gaz grinned. Dib shook his head.

Gaz waved him off, "Thanks. Go away now."

"Bitch," Dib muttered. Gaz shoves him.

Gaz met her escort, a classmate with dark skin and short, coarse hair, in the archway before the banquet hall. Gaz barely remembered the girl's name, but she was the only one of her pool of choices that had short nails.

As Professor Membrane read off some cheesy speech about watching his little girl grow into a woman, Gaz caught a glimpse of Dib and Zim, whom she had tucked into the corner with her older gaming friends who, while she loved, knew from their hours spent playing they probably stunk. They were silently arguing and whenever the one tried to ignore the other, they were met with a finger being jabbed in their side. What almost drew a laugh from her, however, was a gamer who she knew as xXHipsterBunXx, noticed her and gestured dramatically to Dib and Zim, wordlessly saying  _ what the fuck? _

Gaz turned her attention to her father as he spoke, "With that, I'd like to introduce the woman of the hour, Gazlene Membrane!"

The hall was packed. Since she knew nothing about her extended family, or if she even had any, and there was no way in hell her quinceanera would just be her father, and inevitably just Dib, so she decided to find the biggest, fanciest hall, and invite the entire hi skool and all of her online friends that could find the time. 

But there were so many people now, and they were all looking at her. Maybe a pizza party with Dib and a video call with her friends would have been better. She glanced at her brother, who had his phone out and was taking pictures of her. Zim shoved a finger in his ribs and Dib slapped him on the back of the head, not even turning, then gave Gaz a thumbs up. Gaz rolls her eyes at him, but there was a small reassurance.

Gaz's escort whispered, "Your brother needs to really work on displaying his crush."

"They're both dumbasses," Gaz remarked and the girl giggled.  _ Yup _ , she thought,  _ getting some tonight. _

Around them, caterers wandered with finger foods and drinks, some alcoholic for the few adult party-goers, but most fancy juices and virgin cocktails.

***

The event coordinator had the DJ pause the music playing and took the microphone. The middle-aged man beamed, "It's time for the father/daughter dance! Everyone but the lady of the hour and her Dad take your seats!"

The dance floor cleared out and left Gaz standing alone in the middle of the room, everyone staring at her. Her father didn't break through the crowd to join her in the stared.

Gaz scanned the room, looking for him, but his chair was untouched, empty.

_ Is he the bathroom? No, no, he wouldn't have taken his overcoat. _

Gaz turned to Dib, just in time to be staring at his phone, before slamming it down, the only sound in the silent room. It was easy to hear him whisper, "Fuck it." Before stealing xXHipsterBunXx's champagne, chugging it and wading through the crowd.

Dib stood in front of her, holding out a hand, said, "I know it's not ideal… but  _ I'm  _ here."

"Thank you." Gaz murmured, taking his hand and shoulder. The DJ started the music.

"Of course." Dib stated, "You looked like you were going to start throwing things...and it's what family does."

Gaz smiled wearily.

Of course. Family.

Gaz nodded, "You're right."

Dib wasn't a good dancer and kept stepping on her toes. Any other day, she'd grind her first into his gut. Today, she wordlessly accepted the soft, "sorry," He whispered with every misstep.

In her heels, she was the same height as Dib, making it really hard to not stare uncomfortably into his eyes. At least Dib seemed to agree this was awkward and was looking everywhere but Gaz. Over her shoulder, behind himself, his shoes, the ceiling. Gaz watched Zim, arms flailing dramatically as he said something to the other, very annoyed looking, table members.

She barely caught it from the corner of her eye, but it was enough for her stomach to drop.

The song ended before Gaz could get a good enough look, and Dib turned on his heel and sped walked to his table. But Gaz had seen, no matter how fast he walked.

The faded, yellow-brown bruises of five fingers wrapped around his throat. He had been covering it with his hoodies all week.

Any and all inklings that perhaps Dib was just pouty about Zim whooping his ass extra hard were out the window. There are two people in this universe who are allowed to beat Dib up: Gaz as her birthright, and Zim because Dib usually deserves it.

Anyone else will pay. And not "a few kicks to the ribs and breaking a lamp over their head" pay like when Dib takes the last of the poop cola. No, they will be begging to die after Gaz is done with them.

**Huston, we have a problem.**

Gaz slowly picked off her jewelry, placing them on the bathroom counter, she wiped off her Hollywood actress makeup, and she plucked out her bobby pins. Somehow, she ended up with two more in her hair than what she started with. Clearly, they reproduced in her hair.

As she counted and recounted, that yes, somehow, she has more pins, she knocked her ring into the trash can. She cursed, and dug through the can, searching for the ring that quickly sunk to the bottom, but became distracted as she unearthed a pregnancy test, shoved into the bottom of the bin. Gaz started at it, blankly.

Negative.

Her father hadn't been home all week, which was normal, but he was home last night. But the bruise on Dib's neck, the way he's been acting, the shopping trip that seemed to yield no purchases.

She shoved it back into the can, located her ring, and washed it, and her hands.

She started to leave but stopped. Dib hadn't wanted to discuss anything with her, and that meant he probably wanted Professor Membrane to be aware of it even less. Sure, he doesn't dig through the garbage for funsies, but neither does Gaz, and she still found the test.

She pulled the bag from the bin, carrying it to the trash in the backyard. As she dumps the evidence, she notices Dib's Swollen Eyeball hover tablet shoved into the garage, snapped into two pieces to fit. She placed the bag on the ground and pulled out the communicator. It was irreparable, but it didn't take much effort to pry to already fractured backing. To her surprise, the motherboard and primary memory appeared to be untouched. She pulled the parts from the shattered device and resumed tossing away all the garbage.

It didn't take much for Gaz to attach the parts to her existing computer. It added some assorted widgets, files and programs. Gaz quickly deleted the gigabyte sized folder tilted "homework".

The icon for The Swollen Eyeball auto-logged Dib in. There were a few unread messages and missed video calls. Gaz clicked on the newest message, from some user called tunaghost. Gaz read the messages as she scrolled through, the texts getting older as she went.

Tunaghost _ : Are you okay? _

Tunaghost _ : Where are you? Did something happen? _

Tunaghost _ : Mothman? _

Tunaghost _ : Mothman? _

Tunaghost _ : You're quitting? What do you mean? You speak years on here daily and you're just out of the blue leaving? _

Mothman:  _ I won't be logging on again.  _

Gaz scrolled through the older and older messages, they were mostly a mix of Tunaghost annoyed by Dib or trying to mentor him. Mostly annoyed, though.

But a quick glance at most of the chat logs proved it was the most positive experience Dib had on there. Everyone else just seemed frustrated and annoyed with Dib.

Except for Darkbooty.

The more she scrolled through the literal  _ years,  _ the more her blood boiled. She eventually stopped reading each chat and only caught a few here and there.

4 months ago.

Darkbooty:  _ If I had been there I would have stopped your sister from smearing potatoes in your face. _

7 months ago.

Darkbooty:  _ I sent you the night vision camera like I said I would. _

1 year ago.

Darkbooty:  _ Do you think this is real? _

Gaz briefly stopped to watch the video sent with the question. It was of a woman having sex with someone in a cheap sasquatch costume.

Mothman:  _ You can see the zipper! _

Gaz felt like she was covered in bugs, inside and out. His lack of reaction told her it was only going to get worse.

14 months ago:

Darkbooty:  _ You're a sexy young man, girls must be climbing over each other to get you! _

Gaz scrolled passed more people fucking others in bad costumes, mixed in with not-porn of people in bad costumes.

2 years ago:

Darkbooty:  _ Have you started waking up with morning wood yet? It's a real bitch. _

There was some softcore porn of zombie movies extras.

Gaz stopped reading and just let the words blur in front of her face. 

3 years ago.

4 years ago.

5 years ago.

6 years ago.

7 years ago.

Gaz finally scrolled to the first message, after scrolling all night. Thank god for scroll-click and drag.

Darkbooty:  _ You're the new kid right? _

Gaz doesn't bother to read little Dib's info dump.

Darkbooty:  _ Wow, you seem pretty smart for your age? How old are you, anyway? _

Mothman:  _ 9! I'm the only smart 1 in my class! I'm glad somebodys finally can see that! _

Gaz lowered her head on her desk, processing some of the information. This creep was in it for the long con, she's gotta admit. Or maybe he thought he could groom dib into his own personal fuck doll in just a few, nieve years. Maybe he did.

But he seemed to forget, because he knew from the chats that Dib had a sister with a  _ little bit  _ of a temper.

Gaz could honestly say she was more enraged right now than she had ever been in her entire existence. And Dib once broke her Gameslave because she broke his swallow eyeball suitcase because he ate the last breakfast pastry.

But she was calm. She knew exactly what she had to do. After all, he had given Dib his address to come over to discuss Zim.

A bing catches Gaz's attention and a chat box from tunaghost pops up on the screen.

Tunaghost:  _ mothman? Are you okay? I thought you logged off permanently? _

This person seemed genuine, so Gaz typed back.

Mothman:  _ I'm his sister. No, he's not alright. Darkbooty is a pedo. _

Mothman _ : Don't worry tho. He'll get what's coming to him for hurting my brother. _

Gaz disconnected the motherboard from her computer and snapped it in half. Perhaps she shouldn't have told them that. Too late now. She can damage control later. Maybe Tunaghost will even see it Gaz's way and keep the secret.

As Gaz made her way downstairs, she found Zim, laying stomach down on the couch, and Dib, sitting on his back. Zim flailed and tried to buck him off, but couldn't get a grip. Dib calmly flicked through channels as Zim heaved and screamed.

Gaz fetched a pale of roadkill soup and dumped it in the grass. She watched the lye and liquid skin soak into the ground.

And grinned wickedly.

She waited until midnight. She knew she had to be patient and smart about this. Sure, Professor Membrane could and probably would, pay to either have it ignored or for the best lawyer who would easily have it dismissed. Regardless, it was wiser to wait; To make sure the bleach and hydrogen peroxide was stalked up; To make sure the sweats she chose were the shade of blood; to sharpen the butcher knife to cut flesh like it was through slicing air; to come up with an alibi.

She sent a booty call to the girl she had been her escort at her quince. The girl she still can't remember the name of was excited, gave her an address and that her parents were cool. Awesome, more witnesses to her being there.

She filled a bag with red nylon rope, and, just in case, had bought a brand new toy just to further the alibi of going to pound town, and stuck that in the bag, too. Along with the red sweats. She used duct tape to hide the knife against the top of her car's driver footrest. She pried open a tub of the animal she found a day ago. It was only partly decomposed and was falling off the bone. She stuck the lye and a single raw egg in its ribcage and wrapped it in a plastic tarp.

Dib was sitting on the couch, finally actually eating. Gaz didn't even care that it was  _ her  _ pizza.

She told him, "I'm going out."

Dib quickly spun around, grabbed her arm, voice cracking, and said, "it's after midnight! There are creeps around here!" Gaz instinctively slapped him away, his hand quickly turning red with her handprint, but the genuine panic in his eyes reminded her of his true motives.

"Relax," She assured, "I'm going over to see… fuck, I forget her name. My escort. Her parents are at home."

"Okay," He said, "But, call me if you need anything. I'll rush over."

Gaz sighed, "I'm going to ask one last time. Are you alright?"

"I'm fine, I'm fine." Dib slumped down and picked imaginary lint off of his pants, "Stop pestering me on."

Gaz looked at the back of his head. She firmly squeezed his shoulders, before she said, "If I need anything, I'll call."

She didn't give Dib time to grab her again. As she pulled out of the driveway, Dib was standing in the doorway, hugging himself. Gaz choked down the lump in her throat.

***

From her parents, Gaz was able to grasp that the girl's name was Dalia. She was soundly asleep on Gaz's barechest. Gaz almost didn't want to move, she was so soft and warm, Gaz's anger burned hotter, and now could only by blood spill, so she moved Dalia from her body, handling her like a sickly newborn. She tugged the red sweatsuit over her naked body and climbed down her gutter drain. The house was black and all curtains were drawn.

She covered her headlights with duct tape, just in case, drove out the driveway, stopped down the road, removed the tape and resumed driving.

She pulled up to Zim's house, first. The gnomes' eyes light up, preparing to fire laser beams at her. Gaz kicked one into another, smashing them both, as she dodged a couple, kicked another into Zim's front door and threw the last through his window. It didn't take long for him to come out shrieking like nails on a chalkboard.

"Dib-sister! Do you really think you could possibly replace the Dib-smell?" He yelled, "Because the Dib is Zim's enemy and Zim can only have one enemy."

Gaz said, "Yeah, I'm not here to fight you. I'm here to help you."

Zim scoffed, "Zim needs no help!"

"Oh, so you're fine with Dib having another nemesis?"

Zim stares at her before asking, "What do you  _ mean ' _ another nemesis'?"

"Yeah, there's this guy, even more of a threat to Urth than you, and he's already hurt Dib pretty bad." Gaz shrugged nonchalantly, "that's why he hasn't been paying you  _ any  _ attention. He's been focused on something so much worse. I thought maybe you would want to help me take him down, so Dib can be all yours again."

With each word, Zim became more and more visibly furious, before erupting, "Someone  _ dares  _ think they can steal my enemy! Me! Zim! I'll pull his eyeballs out and replace them with ping pong balls!"

"I was going to chop off his limbs and leave him in a boiling broth of his own blood, but we can do that, too." Gaz remarked, "Get in the car."

She drove by Darkbooty’s house once, surveying the area. Zim muttered and ranted about the  _ betrayal  _ and the  _ audacity _ of someone trying to steal his enemy from the "great, almighty Zim".

To her surprise, there was a light on his modest home. She had been planning on tying him up in his sleep before waking him for his slow, painful demise.

She thought quickly, taped the butcher knife, thanked whoever had given Gaz the genes of large breasts and stuck the knife under her left boob, the weight of them with the tape made it possible to hold the blade against her for a short while. She shoved the rope down her pants and it fell in the elastic pant cuff.

She also decided to quickly put her hair into pigtails to make herself look younger. Dumber.

She grabbed the fox-soup-in-a-bag and shoved it into Zim's arms. It squished like pudding.

"hide by his back door. I'll let you in." She instructed.

Zim opened his mouth but Gaz had already driven down the street and parked in some rando's driveway.

She approached the door on foot and knocked, then more frantically when no one answered right away.

The door opened as far as the deadbolt would allow. She could see an eye with a faded shiner.

He slurred, "Who're you 'n' why ar' you knoc-shin' a'ma door at this hour?"

Gaz faked the voice of a scared little girl, "I'm sorry if I woke you but um- well, my boyfriend. I snuck out with my boyfriend and he drove me, but he kicked me out. I don't know this area and I have no phone and you were the first house I came across with a light on…"

He looked her up and down. It felt like glass dust on her skin.

Gaz, for a second, thought of the things that Dib must have endured from this man, the rage bringing hot tears to her eyes.

She quietly pleaded, "Please…"

The door shut, before opening fully. The entire left side of his face was bruised, scratched, and a little caved. Gaz immediately noticed his pupils are two different sizes. This is going to be too easy.

"I'll make you some chai tea," He said, "You can use my computer to find your house."

Gaz sneered at him.

He had led Gaz to his PC. His arm was in a homemade sling and he walked with a very noticeable limp, trying to put no weight on his leg. He was breathing heavily, unevenly, and with a wheeze.

He left her alone in the room to make tea. His desktop background was of a group of pubescent girls, maybe 14, in bikinis at a beach. One vaguely resembled him. Perhaps a granddaughter? Gaz scratched her crawling skin.

Gaz copied every file, folder, image, everything and sent it to herself through several emails, before deleting the logs and the internet history that she had made.

She glanced around the room. There were photos of families and children. She saw the girl that looked like him in a bunch of them, and what was possibly her parents. There were also a bunch of children who looked nothing like him.

Gaz's eyes land on a picture of Dib. He was 13 in the picture. Gaz knew because of the HUGE zit he had on his nose. She had called him Rudolph for weeks until it could be popped. She had even used a sharpie to draw a deer around it in his sleep. The image was of him in his room, displaying a bunch of photos of Zim, mid rant. She ripped it off the wall and crumbled it up. She had no pockets to hide it, so she eventually decided to drop it down her pants leg, opposite of the rope.

She found a few more images of Dib, handling each in the same manner. She couldn't tell if she was nauseated from the situation alone or her pure, unregulated hatred.

Before going after him, she made one final split decision, and finds herself sending the same emails she sent to herself to the local crime stoppers.

Gaz stepped up quietly to the kitchen and peers at him from around the corner. He was boiling water in a kettle on the stove. She watched him as he pulled a dollar store vial with a cork from behind a small jar of sugar and a bottle of honey, dripped a drop onto his finger and ran it over the rim of a teacup. After he hid it away again and pulled down the sugar and honey, Gaz walked fully into the kitchen.

He turned around and gave Gaz a toothless, gummy smile. He asks, "Did you find your address."

"Yes, I found everything I need to know." Gaz remarks. Darkbooty turned around with a quizzical expression, just in time for Gaz to pull the butcher knife from under her breast and slammed the dull end over his head, hard, and knocking him out.

Gaz shook the rope from her pant leg before letting Zim. He is holding the garbage bag as far away from him as he can and readied to complain, but Gaz stopped him, "Put it on the table. Help me tie this fucker to a chair."

Zim opened his mouth again, and Gaz emphasized, "Now. Quickly."

Gaz lifted the elderly man into a chair and Zim tied his feet to the chair legs and his arms behind his back.

Gaz located the small vile. It was clear and, once uncorked, smelled like nothing.

She put it on the table next to the fox carcass, before unwrapping the dead animal, filling the room with the scent of rotted meat. Zim yelped and covered his wig with his hands, trying to block the rancid smell. She plucks a chunk of decaying flesh from the bone and pushed it between the lips of Darkbooty.

He sprung awake and spat the meat out. Gaz quickly made a ball gag with a knot of rope and forced it onto his face so hard his head snapped back, and she tightened enough to bite into his skin. She took the flesh and, liftting the gag over his nose, shoved it back into his mouth, before replacing the gag, and tightening it.

He screamed as much as he could, but eventually realized that the only way to get it out of his mouth was to swallow the decomposing, lye soaked fox flesh, was to swallow it.

Gaz watched in twisted glee as the dead animal slid down his throat.

"Bet you're wondering why-"

"You  _ dare  _ think you could steal  _ my _ , the GREAT and MIGHTY ZIM's nemesis! You will PAY! Dib is MINE."

Darkbooty looked between his captures with rising fear. Gaz turned the vial of clear liquid upside down and upright shin in his face, asking, "This is GHB, correct?"

Behind her, Zim repeated, "Dib is MINE and you will PAY!"

Gaz continued, "You used this before, haven't you? On Dib, Mothman, my brother." Darkbooty's eyes widened and he muffled something from behind the rope.

"You DARE lay a hand on ZIM'S enemy?!"

Gaz speaks"Thought you were clever, didn't you? Thought you had the perfect little victim, right? His dad doesn't care, he's got no friends, everyone already thinks he's crazy. You thought you wouldn't have any repercussions?" Gaz questioned. She poured a tiny of the drug onto her pointer and middle fingers.

"He trusted you so, so much. Bet he even told you about his scary, mean little sister, didn't he?" She looked the man in the eyes, "Bet he mentioned how I've some  _ anger issues,  _ and well-" Gaz shoved her drugged and bloody fingers into his nose as far as she could, suffocating him between that and the ballgag, "You’ve made me  _ FUCKING  _ angry."

She kicked him, his head cracking on the laminated tiled floor, but he groaned and opened his eyes.

The kettle whistled.

Zim was still going off about Dib being his, so Gaz turned to him, "Hey, Zim, have you ever heard of waterboarding?"

"No, I avoid anything to do with your vile fire liquid." He answered. Gaz hummed.

"Hand me that hand towel," She said, "You're about to learn."

Gaz draped the towel over Darkbooty's face, picked up the kettle, and declared, "This is for Dib."

His shrieks were muted by the gag and his tied limbs left him stiffly spasming as Gaz very slowly poured the entirety of boiling water on the man's covered face. Once empty, she dropped the kettle after the fluid. He continued to try to scream and kick.

Gaz looked to Zim, "Usually it's freezing water, but I think that hurt him even more, wouldn't you agree?"

"In invader training, we had to go through similar experiences," Zim nodded, "Zim would like to do something."

Gaz peeled the towel off of his face, saying, "Be my guest." His scream shrunk into desperate whimpers.

Zim started rummaging through drawers.

"Ah-ha!" Zim proclaimed, presenting a potato peeler.

Gaz wondered, "What are you planning to do with that?"

Zim snuggly lifted Darkbooty's shirt, and-

His yowls of pain and trying to squirm away resumed.

Gaz complimented, "Creative."

After the fifth new flap of skin and puddles of blood, Zim announces, taking the kettle, "I've learned  _ this  _ after my test subjects kept dying!" He pressed the burning kettle to the wounds, cauterizing them. Darkbooty didn't even scream, only whimpered.

Gaz picked up the butcher knife, and effortlessly chopped off his toes, one by one, taunting, "...and this little piggy had none! And this little piggy went  _ wee wee wee _ , all the way home. She tossed them all into the kitchen sink. Zim attempted to cauterize the holes, but the kettle was no longer hot enough. He spiked it into Darkbooty's face, repeating, "DIB IS MINE!"

Gaz started chopping up his legs, a couple of inches at a time. Darkbooty was staring, blank and wide-eyed, but still breathing, faintly. His leg slices went to the sink, too, and Gaz gave the same treatment to his arms.

"You're not feeling anything anymore, are you?" Gaz asked Darkbooty. He stared at the ceiling, blinking slowly. Gaz sighed, "I guess I'll be merciful, then."

She ripped the gag off, cutting his face, and poured the remaining GHB down his gullet. She grabbed him by the jaw, forcing him to look at her.

"I'd cut your musty, adolescent perving dick off, but I'm not granting you the pleasure of having one more teen touch it, you revolting pedophile."

She stood up, and stomped on his throat, flattening it completely. He wheezed and struggled to breathe for a few minutes.

Gaz pulled the raw egg from the fox's corpse, and shoved it in the drain, plugging it. Zim asks, "What's that going to do?"

"It'll dissolve slowly. So he will melt a bit before going down the drain."

Gaz handed Zim the knife, ordering, "Cut him into smaller chunks."

Zim refused, "Absolutely not! You can't tell Zim what to do!"

"Alright, then  _ you _ get the lye soap out of the dead fox's ribs." She offered. Zim looks at the rotten fox then accepts the knife.

"I'll cut him up." He agreed.

Gaz popped the lye open and put some into the sink, mixing it with water. 

Zim abruptly dropped the remaining of Darkbooty's diced up body into the sink. One it was full, Gaz put the tarp over the sink and duct-taped it in place.

"There, now we just need to clean up this mess." Gaz declared. Zim nodded, "Human guts are always so disgusting."

Gaz agreed, "Y'know, most humans would agree." 

Zim pulled out a strange looking spray bottle and started spraying the lake of blood that covered the kitchen.

Gaz inquired, "What are you doing?"

Zim answered, "I hated having to clean up after all my experiments, so I have made a serum that completely dissolved human."

"Terrifying," Gaz remarked, "But fantastic. Is it just blood or anything human?"

"Anything."

"Why did you chop up the guy if you could have just sprayed him away?"

"DO NOT QUESTION ZIM!"

Gaz pinched her nose as Zim cleaned the room, humming a cheery tune. She decided to do as he said. She didn't want to risk him running off and leaving her the mess.

Gaz started scooping out human chunks from the sink and tossing it to where Zim was spraying. She stopped at the severed head, turning it in her hands. It was surprisingly heavy.

She wrapped it in the tarp and put the fox in one less fold, so if checked it would be found first with the head still hidden.

As Zim finished cleaning, and upon Gaz's request, sprayed down the computer, door handles, and everything else they've touched, even as they closed the door behind them.

"experimenting with the head?" Zim asked, "Let me tell you, humans don't have a whole lot going on their brains."

Gaz stared down at him and he shrunk, correcting, "With a  _ few  _ exceptions, of course."

"C'mon. The car's down the road."

"Bring it to Zim!" He demanded. He once more wilted under Gaz's gaze, and corrected himself, "Zim will walk with you."

Just short of Zim's cul de sac, a cop cruiser's lights catch in Gaz's rearview mirror. She pulled over and rolled down her window for them.

"Good evening, officer." She greeted, calmly, "What seemed to be the issue?"

The coo faltered back as the wall of rot stench crashed into him. He covered his nose with his collar and demanded, " _ What  _ is the smell?"

"Oh, my apologies. I'm into vulture culture and saw this fox on the side of the road…"

"What the hell is vulture culture?!" He hissed.

"Keeping skulls and bones and stuff of dead animals. The different bone structures of different animals are so  _ fascinating! _ " Gaz explained, "You're free to look if you'd like, it's wrapped up in the back seat."

He waved his partner over and ordered Gaz, "Stay here."

They have a quick discussion on the road. The partner went to the side door as the first cop returned to the window.

"License and registration, please."

Gaz had purposely given him Dib's. As he grabbed it, Gaz feigned shock, "Oh, hold on. That's my brother's, let me just…" She started rummaging around for her non-existent drivers license.

The officer pulled back some folded and jerked back as the exposed roadkill assaulted his senses and quickly covered it back up.

"Membrane? As in the very  _ powerful  _ scientist?" He asked, suddenly pale.

Gaz dug through the glove compartment, confirming, "Yeah, he's my dad."

He cleared his throat and practically tossed the ID at her, "Carry on."

The officers share a glance before returning to their cruiser.

Gaz kicked Zim out at the entrance to his cul de sac, and made her way back to Dalia's, climbed back in, stuffed the bloody clothes in her back, washed up, and crawled back into bed like nothing ever happened.

**Mayday, Mayday, Houston!**

Dib sat at the new kitchen table, lost in his head with a cold mug of black coffee. Gaz walked past him to clean the newly fleshless skull off in the sink. 

"Didn't Dad tell you to stop doing that?"

"He also said he would be there for my quince. What's it matter what he said?"

"Fair enough."

After drying it with a paper towel, Gaz dropped the skull in front of Dib. His eyes bulged out of his head as he sputtered, " _ Gaz!  _ What did you do?! Who is- What did you do?!"

She sat in the chair beside him and told him, "It's Darkbooty."

Dib's mouth hung open as he looked at it, to her, and back. When Gaz saw the realization set it, she continued, "Listen. I won't make you talk about it. You can do it on your own terms if you ever want to at all. I get it if you don't, feelings suck and I'm worse at them than you are."

"But just know, I'm your sister. Family. I got your back, no matter what, and I'll slaughter anyone for you, no questions asked."

Dib's face was blank before he started hyperventilating and tears gushed out. Gaz leaned over and wrapped her arms around, not caring if he got snot on her, and added, "You fucked him up pretty good before I got there. I think his internal bleeding was about to get him of I hadn't gotten to him first."

Dib buried his face into her shoulder, hiccuping, "I don't even know what happened! Everything was fine and suddenly I was diz- dizzy, then unconscious! I don't…"

Gaz rubbed his back, "Then I just woke up… dirty."

"You're not dirty." Gaz cooed. Dib hiccuped again, "And it's nothing you could have prevented. He drugged you, and he tried to drug me, too."

"I'm sorry," Dib said.

Gaz assured, "You didn't do anything wrong. He knew what he was doing and you weren't his only victim. He was good."

Gaz pulled away and put her hands on Dib's shoulders, "But now he's as good as dead."

He half-heartedly laughed, and Gaz awkwardly smiled.

"Dib, I- ugh." Gaz shakeed, "I don't like it, but you need to hear it, but… I love you, and stuff. You also, like, my sorta best friend. And I'm here for you if you ever need someone to talk at."

Dib wiped his eyes, now smiling wobbly, "I… love you, too, Gaz. Thank you." He hugged her again, which she allowed.

"By the way, for years I've unsure if you and Zim would end up killing each other or fucking, and as he was helping me with that fucko, he was referring to you as his Dib, so yeah. I'm calling it now. You two are going to fuck."

Dib scoffed and shoved Gaz onto the floor. She managed to kick him in the stomach. As he writhed in pain, Gaz dusted herself off, "Everything I said still stands true, and always will."

**Author's Note:**

> welp. *clamps*


End file.
